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18 January, 2013

Thailand: Back for more of the good stuff (Friday - evening)

I have been remiss to complete this blog. It is now August, and I am looking at the history and seeing that I left an unfinished story. While I won't have the details to share due to my eroding memories, I would like to at least document the rough idea of how the rest of the itinerary went, for sake of posterity.

After the long day at the Similan Islands, we were both pretty tired. I recall returning to the hotel and crashing for some period of time, perhaps a couple of hours. The plan, all along, was to return to the restaurant that we loved so much, and see Jakkie and Nu one more time. Blue Mist is the name, as I mentioned previously. Used to be called Blue Dolphin and now it's Blue Mist. We were immediately greeted by our friends, who were both there because, in Thailand, where else would a small business owner be other than at their business? I don't remember the details, other than that it was another great meal, and that Jakkie and Nu, and perhaps Nu's girlfriend joined us at the table for a bit and we chatted about more things, all of which escape me now. I really wish I had written this back on January 19th when I could have told you everything that happened.

This was to be our final night in Khao Lak. It's back to Bangkok tomorrow for the final couple of days of the trip. As I write this, I look back with some regret, because the company really was great company. We were both lucky to be there together. But we were having a hard time appreciating it because of the barriers, mostly mine, which were in place. Looking back, I wish I had at least been nicer. There was a time in my life, "pre-yoga" (which actually ended some period of time before I actually started doing yoga), where I wouldn't have expected myself to be able to act with kindness under all circumstances. But I had been practicing whatever we like to call that thing that is "mindfulness" for over a year at that point, and I still was not willing or able to walk the line of compassion. I think the battle was actually with myself, and that's the battle where it's hardest for me to be compassionate. I was mad at myself for not being able to be something I was not ever going to be able to be. And Melissa got caught in the crossfire.

But this is about Thailand, so I will stop there.

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